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Title: The Elizabeth I Poems
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Forever_Amber
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Score: 575
Posts: 575
From: USA

(Date Posted:02/20/2009 7:54 AM)
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From: MSN NicknamePainter12952 Sent: 1/1/2003 4:12 PM
 
"Oh Bessie! Come and share my life!
"Not now Bob, you have a wife"
"But I will throw her down the stairs!"
"You gonna catch her unawares?"
"That's right! I'll shove her! She will fall!"
"Then you can have me after all!"
 
**********************************
 
"Oh Bess! At last, the wife is dead!"
"Did she fall down and bump her head?"
"Indeed she did! She smashed her brain!
"Then let me take away your pain."
"You mean that I can bone you now?"
"No, Bobby , I must wax my brow"
 
***********************************
 
"But you waxed your entire head!"
"Now you don't want me in the bed?"
"You're bald! Go get yourself a wig!"
"I am the queen and you're a pig!"
"Forgive me Bess! I am a swine!"
"And you expect I'll make you mine?"
 
***********************************
 
"But look at what I did for you!"
"You killed your wife, and left no clue?"
"That's right! So let me have my way!"
"I'm gonna paint my face today"
"You mean that you're not really white?"
"Without my makeup I'm a fright!"
 
************************************
 
"So what is your excuse today?"
"I have to wash the paint away!!"
"But you'll expose your liver spots!"
"Then go and bone the Queen of Scots!"

From: MSN NicknamePainter12952 Sent: 1/1/2003 4:14 PM
 
"But I don't want the Scottish whore!
I wanna be behind YOUR door!
The broad is loose, but you are tight!
You are the one I want tonight!"
 
"Now down boy! Don't get in a huff!
Who said that you could have my stuff?
I have to keep you in your place,
You may not go past second base!"
 
"But second base just will not do!
What will it take to conquer you?
You have to overcome your fear
Or someone's gonna think you're queer!"
 
"I'm not a lezbo! I like men!
But I can still remember when
My father cut off Mothers head
Because I was a girl instead!
 
So I am never gonna bone!
I'll never give a man my throne!
I'll keep my head, and save my life
And I will be nobody's wife!!"
(Message edited by Forever_AmberOn02/20/2009 8:12 AM)
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Rank:Diamond Member

Score:575
Posts:575
From: USA

RE:The Elizabeth I Poems
(Date Posted:02/20/2009 8:12 AM)

From: MSN NicknamePainter12952 Sent: 1/1/2003 4:50 PM
 
The man is a creep! 'E is really a bum!
'E dinna  wan me, and  'e  'ated me mum!
I were not a boy so he cut off  'er  'ed
An'  'ad 'im a son with Jane Seymour instead!
 
One day, I'm a princess,  an' next it ain't so!
'E said that me mummy was only a ho!
'E calls me a bastard! E's 'orrible! Fie!
An'  I canna wait until e's gonna die!
 
I'm gonna be queen an' I'll sit in the throne
I'm gonna rule Engand an' do it alone!
No man will  not ever 'av me in 'is bed
Cuz I do not wannim to whack off me 'ed.
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Rank:Diamond Member

Score:575
Posts:575
From: USA

RE:The Elizabeth I Poems
(Date Posted:02/20/2009 9:04 AM)

From: MSN NicknamePainter12952 Sent: 2/13/2003 11:31 PM
Hey  Abby !  You cannot retire
Before you hear my hearts desire!
So listen up ! It's my command,
Cuz Thomas Seymour wants my hand!
 
He's says he wants to marry me
But we cannot until he's free!
He's married to that Katie Parr
But she is still alive so far !
 
He's really hot ! He's such a stud ,
And says his marriage is a dud !
So if he loves me, tell me why
She's pregnant !  Is she gonna die?
 
I am confused ! I need your aid !
He wants to make me not a maid !
So should I climb into his bed
Before someone chops off his head ?
 
Love,
Lizzie
From: MSN NicknamePainter12952 Sent: 2/13/2003 11:49 PM
Alright already !  I'll reply !
The truth is, Katie's gonna die !
I looked into my crystal ball
And soon she'll be dead after all .
 
But listen Liz to my advice
Cuz I don't wanna say it twice !
That Seymour's bad ! Do not give in !
He only wants a crown to win.
 
So do not bone him,  stay  afar ,
And don't end up like Katie Parr !
He's handsome, yes, but he's a creep,
He'll bed another while you sleep !
 
You're better off to stay a maid
And never end up getting laid.
So be content, you're gonna rule,
And they will soon behead the fool.
 
Can I go now ?
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